Interview: Part 3

 What would your advice be for women who would like to attract men into their lives and have great relationships, but are currently struggling to do that?

Attracting men into your life may seem impossible sometimes because you look around and think 1. All the good men have been taken: There are still great men out there but just like women aren’t all alike, men aren’t all alike either. Everyone wants something a little different. 2. Do any men even live in my city? Yes, men are in your city, you just might need to spread your circle a little. 3. Is there something wrong with me? There probably isn’t something wrong with you, but you know what you want, you just haven’t found it yet. Through conversations with men, there are a few things that they do (for the most part) all find the most attractive in women.

First, be yourself. In the movie The Ugly Truth Katherine Heigl spends a majority of the movie being, what she is told, the “right” kinda woman to attract her hot physician neighbor, Colin. It works, and Colin likes her but she has added hair extensions and squelched her Type A personality to become some “loosey-goosey all caution to the wind” kinda woman. And of course in the end, it’s too much for her to keep up with, she is miserable, and she breaks it off with Colin. In saying all of that, conforming to what you think a man “expects” and losing yourself will not work out in what you want long term. It’s a lie, it’s exhausting, and it’s just not you.

Confidence. It’s what I hear over and over from men. Since I am not one, I don’t know what they see and what makes a confident woman stand out from one who is not, but they love it. LOVE IT.

Put yourself out there. Get on a dating website, pick up one of the many dating apps out there and just explore! Don’t be afraid to meet new people. A rule I always stood by is if a guy had the courage to ask me out, I give him a shot. People can surprise you and who knows where one date with someone can take you. Something I hear a lot of is “he’s not my type” but has “your type” worked for you so far? You just may want a little something different but you haven’t figured it out yet. Be open to possibilities.

Most importantly, enjoy the season of life that you are in right now. It may not be where you envisioned yourself, but it’s where you are right now. Live for yourself and enjoy having your time be your time. Find new activities, try something new, pick up a hobby…be content (which is far easier said than done). There are things you are able to do now that you could not do with a boyfriend, fiancé, spouse, or children so take the opportunity to live your life without obligation to someone else and it will help prepare you for that time when you are sharing your life with someone else.

 

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